Pick up your cell phone. Right now. Look up the last person you called. Call them back. I want you to ask one simple question. I want you to ask them what the last thing you said to them was.

Whatever they tell you, write it down. On a single sheet of paper. In really big letters. Make sure you get it right. It might be the most important thing you ever write.

Now hang it where you’ll be forced to read it every day. By your desk, next to your computer, on the back of the toilet — somewhere you’re going to see it every day for the foreseeable future.

That sentence is how somebody remembers you. It’s the most recent impression they have of your character, who you are as a human being, as a businessperson, as an employee, as a parent, as a member of the PTA, and so on. It’s how you left the stage. It’s the parting shot, the climax of the scene that began and ended with the phone call. It’s now a part of who you are to someone else.

Heavy, I know. Stay with me.

You Are a Magician

Long-distance communication, whether by phone, email, Skype or CB radio, is magic. Don’t believe me? What if I told you that as I write this, I’m sitting in my suburban living room on a couch that is covered in a retro-looking red-and-gray plaid uphostery, running shoes crossed and propped up on a well-loved coffee table, typing on a laptop I bought at Wal-Mart while my son snores rather loudly in the adjacent bedroom. Can you see my living room? Do you have a rough idea as to how I look? We’ve never met, have we? And yet you can see me here, as I write this, can’t you?

That’s magic, baby.

You and I are fortunate in that we have the ability to move people with our words. We have the ability to inspire thoughts, to impress upon others sentiments, feelings and inclinations. Ours is a gift that few possess, and fewer know they possess it. And every interaction that we have with another human being, no matter the medium, is an opportunity to make an impression.

Think about that. The ancients believed that spells could be cast by putting together the right combination of syllables, as though there was some spiritual life force that could be tapped by speaking the secret password. That’s a bit dramatic, of course. But you do have the power to make someone think something that they weren’t thinking before. And it has nothing to do with psychic abilities or whatever Leonardo DiCaprio did in Inception. It’s just a matter of using the right words to paint a picture.

What Do You Say About You?

Look at the big sentence on your sheet of paper. Have you figured out what kind of impression that left? Oh, but you didn’t know I was watching you; so how could I expect this particular example to be indicative of how you portray yourself? Well, I suppose I don’t. But if every interaction is an opportunity to create an impression, then every time you fail to do so is a missed opportunity. That means there’s room for improvement.

How can you make the sentence on that piece of paper better? What could you have said instead that would have contained the same information and created a better picture of who you are? Swap some words around. Replace some things. Start over from scratch if you have to. Figure out how to make your sentence better. Now make those edits on your big piece of paper. Yes, cross things out, use carrots, draw big swooping arrows. It doesn’t have to be neat. But the end result has to be more impressive than the original.

Now, then. Every day I want you to read that new sentence to yourself. Before every conversation you have. And I want you to remember that the very next words you say have the power to leave an impression, and that impression is entirely in your control. The words you choose matter.

You are always on. Always.

What do you say?